Woods or Sabbath?

"Come away into the shade," the leaves rustled as the heat of summer pushed towards the edge of the woods' relief. "There is rest from exposure, and many judging eyes," it coaxed convincingly. 

The woods of which I write are actually a real place, in spite of the recent Broadway-turned-movie release. And there was a very pivotal time in my life when I would run into them to remind myself of who I thought I really was: worthless. 

More on those trees later. 

I want to talk about obeying the Sabbath. 

It doesn't really make sense in this materialistic, self-serving culture of valley girls, take-out and Netflix to truly rest. We don't know how or why or what. We might be able to conjure up enough Americanism, or even Conservatism, to sink into a good old-fashioned afternoon of family dinner and subsequent napping. But when was the last time you actually rested in a full-bodied, soul-deep, conscience-clear silence?

Rest is one of the sweetest commands God has given, and I have to fight a lot of different factors in myself to accept, embrace, and obey it. 

See, I didn't really have any before I surrendered to Him. I wanted to deserve and earn it.  Year after year, law after law, failure after utter failure, that time never came. 

Just coming from the Holidays and the turnover of another calendar year, you probably know what I'm talking about. Whether you've struggled with depression, family troubles, money troubles, an eating disorder, sufferings you didn't choose, or just a plain serving of pride, internal and physical To Do Lists weigh pretty heavy. 

But the voices of busyness speaking to our lurking desires to succeed are nothing short of deceptive, and disobedient. 

"Transgression speaks to the ungodly within his heart; There is no fear of God before his eyes. For it flatters him in his own eyes concerning the discovery of his iniquity and the hatred of it." Psalm 36:1-2 

This passage injures my conscience. Because when I don't do something well, my first response is NOT to rest. In fact, it is to deny myself rest until such a time as it has been done well. But why is that? Often, it's because I want to do it right. 

That's not a good enough reason, Believers. 

Did you hear the Word of the Lord? Transgression flatters us. It doesn't want our iniquity to be discovered. And sure, it may get us to hate our iniquity - but not because it is evil, rather because it is goading us to compete. 

This. This takes our eyes off the prize, our eyes off the One, sweet Savior who paid for the redemption and forgiveness of our sins. He demands us to admit our weaknesses, because all the glory belongs to Him. 

When I run into the woods for shade before going back to the toil of my perfectionism, I have purchased the rest of a soul-whore with the money of my Father. 

Jesus said: "Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart" Matthew 11:28-29a.

Those are commands, my Friends. Commands that I have disobeyed, and kept at arms'-length many a time because of selfish pride. But for one of the first times, I am trying this resting thing. And it is leading me to places of open worship.